abigail414's diaryland diary
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Update from the Fringes
Events of the week include:
Downsized: I fit into my size 10 jeans (yes, snugly, but my bigger jeans were just, big). Unfortunately, I still consider myself �fat� until I�m a single digit.
Entertained: Went to my first movie in 1� years. It was a foreign film called �The Science of Sleep�, and was horrid, but the theater was lovely. It had an outdoor wine bar and you brought your drink into the movie. Wow. Makes a lot more sense than diet coke. I saw Daniel (Gwen's friend) again and noted my desire to be the little girl making sad daddy happy, and just didn�t act upon it (and think he�s lost interest).
Discovered life lesson: I went to a hypnotherapist and found out that my life lesson has something to do with self-worth. I tend to be really hard on myself and find partners to do the same (and yes am also hard on others). I have a lot of good �reasons� for that behavior, but it is time to move on. To be continued in session #2, of course.
Had otherworldly visitors: My session with the hypnotherapist pointed out that my sleep disorder is due in part to discarnate beings (aka ghosts) inhabiting my body and disturbing me. Yes, that looks odd in print, but makes total sense.
Slowed down and reconsidered: Upon further reflection, it may be in my best interest to stay in the desert for now - and going to Sonoma is more like running away. Plus, the weather has returned to lovely, I am seeing clients and co-workers everywhere, and happy coincidences abount. So I cancelled my flight and went house shopping with mom - prices are dropping, but still stratospheric. This decision also took into account a telephone interview with a practice up in Forestville - I�d rather work here another couple years and then just buy it instead.
Announced my singleness: I put myself out on yahoo personals and have gotten a number of hits, a couple of which may pan out into at least real dates and not slimy bar schmooze. Don�t think either are �the one� and not sure there really is a �one�, but might be fun to check it out. I don't know how to hotlink, but this is my 'ad'. http://personals.yahoo.com/us/personals-1120878871-107372
Missed fall: This is my first fall without color. Even though it made me sad knowing that winter was coming, it was a beautiful time of year. I�m walking around in a tank top and cutoffs and sandals and getting LL Bean catalogs for fleece and warm boots and may just have to drive up to Idyllwild for crunchy leaves and crisp air.
Felt briefly enlightened: Last weekend I was given a holy hug and third eye awakening by Mirabai Devi, a spiritual healer who came to our yoga center and did Darshan. She is a south African with thick pancake makup and an amazing floral scent that stayed with us for hours. It was very ritualized, like Catholic communion and was actually a profound temporary zap that may have helped me be nice to mom the past couple days (by making me a teensy bit more tolerant of myself and others).
Observed debauchery: After Darshan, Gwen and I hit the streets of Palm Springs in our radiant cosmic garb for the annual Biker Week festivities. Thousands of bikers and faux bikers come to town to party in their black leather and tattoos. We ended up sipping wine at a nice bar surrounded by members of the Mongols biker club (a scary mexican version of Hell's Angels) and 2 swat teams nearby. Then we went to the official biker bar 'The Kickstand' where Saul (last entry's cellphone flasher) was a bouncer. I love contrasts, and it doesn't get much more different in one night.
Enjoyed my clients: One was a huge woman with a bad bleach job in a mumu who could barely stand up without getting winded � her 120 dog named Thor was hiding beneath her. And then there was the guy whose mellow yellow lab was also at his feet, so while kneeling on the floor doing an exam I glanced up and saw he was going commando with testicles hanging. This augmented my previous cell phone flash of penis, making my week complete . And the lady who swore her dog had worms crawling under its skin and if she squeezed them they burst out at her. And, the cat hit by a car with the eyeball popped out, whose owners saw a kitten while bringing him in and fell all in love so said put down the broken cat because they have a new one. After it was dead I practiced popping the eye back in.
Decided to make this 'home' for now: What a difference a week can make. Even though my landlord is kicking me out, a little 'don't worry be happy no matter where you go there you are' has somehow seeped in. For today, it looks like I'll be here awhile longer. So, to my friends in the frigid Midwest and bleak winter coastal areas - plan to come visit in gray February when you can't stand it any longer!
5:41 p.m. - 2006-10-09
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